Coming Along Nicely

So my new site is coming together! If you haven’t checked it out, I’m moving slowly to http://www.mypenwritesred.com. I’ve acquired a Twitter handle – @mypenwritesred. In my world, that’s a big, scary step into the unknown. But, I’m excited to get myself into a routine with this blog and I’m learning as much as I can about being PR friendly, Media Kits and boundaries. I’ll be testing some advertisements with a friend’s business card to start… ooh, maybe I’ll have a bulletin board type of feel instead!?! Huh… possibilities are endless.

Thanks for keeping up! And please, let me know what you think of the site – if you have any insight to flow, readability, or just something you’d like to see from me (whether it be a story, a question or a product review), don’t hesitate to comment or email!

Welcome to my adventure – by all means, hang on!

Peace,
Mel

 

My Adventure, My Rules

Right? That’s the Mom’s Right, to make the rules? You know what I like best? The part where I get to break the rules! I know, I know… that’s horrible parenting talking, but guess what… neener ,neener, neener.

Can you tell I’m feeling a little better? The Moon is in the 7^th House of… but seriously.

So, some news here and there, that I hope you’ll be excited for! But first – DECOMPRESSION!

These past few weeks, I’ve spiraled into another one of my unexplainable yet totally explainable cycles of sadness and frustration. From PMS to not taking my anti-anxiety medicine to bitterness over changes in planning, it’s all just piled atop my thin yet pudgy shoulders and I’ve not handled well… or gracefully. I’ve yelled a lot at both the Grizzly Bear and the kids, I’ve eaten a lot of ice cream in bed (I KNOW, we’re back to THAT??), and I’ve totally withdrawn… totally.

But, after one of the best adult discussions I’ve ever had with my great big ol’ grizzly bear of a husband, I’ve got some renewed faith in both our situation, myself and our little world.

I’ve jumped right back into my Work Weight Loss Challenge, I’ve got renewed drive at work and… ready for the big news?

I’ve got my own website!!! Thank you, thank you… yes, I’m excited.

Sadly, I chose to change the name. HOWEVER, mybrokenhallelujah will remain a section of the overall site, at least for a time. I’m not selling anything, though I am exploring the PR friendly aspect, and I will be using it as a BzzAgent for product reviews. Of course, there will still be my often hilarious, mostly inappropriate, ranting and raving about totally low-level importance stuff – like traffic. The guts are still being fleshed out, but I’m excited to detail some of the fun things I do in life to make my monotonous existence more interesting – like Annual Color Week (which may change to Semi-Annual Color Week!) and the newly added Bake Week! Plus, the addition of college to my 30-something mom with a full-time job is bound to add some interesting conversations to my worldview.

So for now, I’ll continue to update here at mybrokenhallelujah.wordpress.com, but I’ll also be updating and cleaning and organizing the new site – Are ready for it?

www.mypenwritesred.com

Doesn’t that sound so cool?!?!? Sure, it’s not poetic… well, maybe it is.
But think about it. When you’re a kid, your teacher marks all of your mistakes with red. Psychologically, red is an agitated color. Red means stop. Red means hot. Red is… passion, love, fire, anger, wrong and right. Maybe I’m reading too far into red. Also, I really like red. It’s my second favorite color.

So, check me out. I’m on Twitter now too, which totally scares the poop out of me (@mypenwritesred) and I’m not at all sure what I’m doing there or what I’m saying, but hey, I’m used to embarrassing myself.

I hope you’ll continue to join me on my adventure. Feel free to yell at me, email me, call me a sellout… as long as you say it with love, we’re good. 🙂

Much love,
Mel

 

Poop and Perfume

Life moves on and things get left behind… people get left behind. Some things have happened in the last couple of weeks that have made me hibernate a bit. I embarrassed myself with some family drama, got my hopes up too soon (probably several times) and made a decision to begin a new adventure (more coming on that soon).

I’ve tried to keep this blog relatively anonymous and tend to refer to my family like a zoo. Our 3-year-old was born 6 weeks early at 4lbs n’ some odd ounces. But she was all arms and legs – therefore, she became my little Spider Monkey. She loves to climb, especially people, and is as daring as Evil Knievel in a dress. Our 4 ½ year old was born right on time, if not surrounded by a bit of drama, but still tiny at 5lbs 14oz. He was this little peanut of a guy, so easy and quiet… thus – Peanut. He loves anything with wheels and can make an exact replica of Optimus Prime with 15 Legos, all primary colors, in less than 45 seconds while making transforming noises… amazingly awesome transforming noises. And finally, the Grizzly Bear and I have been married for 8 years this coming February. He has been one hairy mo’ fo’ since I met him… my very own, personalized bear skin rug. Now, some ladies might find this a major turn off, but this man can grow one damn-sexy beard in 16 hours… and THAT, well… there are no words.

I love my little zoo. We get along pretty well most of the time and complement each other’s moods the rest of the time. We’re just an average family looking to both provide the best for our children while making the best of the world around us. A lot of the time, this means that we hide… A LOT. When things get dramatic, we tend to just hunker down and hide from the world. For me, any little conflict can send me into hiding. I take things entirely too personal. I’m working on it… among other things.

Today is the day I should be updating you on my progress in the Biggest Loser Challenge at work. Sadly, I’ve gained another 2 pounds. That’s how bad this week has been… I ate so much yesterday, that I didn’t even eat dinner because I was still full from a noon lunch! Oh, don’t worry; I didn’t go to bed without the nightly frozen fruit pop. Duh.

There’s something going on in my head. My brain isn’t shutting off and I’m constantly trying to do one thing right after another. It’s hard to concentrate; it’s hard to sit down for too long, it’s hard to stand up for too long… I’m always in some sort of mild ache or pain and I’m simply exhausted. Oh, and I started drinking soda again.

I’m right back to square one and thoroughly pissing myself off.

So where does poop and perfume come in? I’m glad you asked. Have you ever walked into a bathroom and smelled someone’s extremely strong perfume? Have you ever tried to keep from inhaling that perfume, only being able to hold your breath so long, until you ended up with a huge whiff? Have you ever taken that huge whiff out of extreme need for oxygen, only to smell that underlying scent of human excrement?

Yeah. That’s how I feel right now. Like perfume scented poop. Strange experience, I know. But the feeling’s there nonetheless.

So what do I do about it?
Eat mass quantities of comfort food.

How’s that working with my weight loss challenge?
Like gangbusters… [insert sarcasm here] obviously.

Hopefully, I’ll get back into a groove this weekend. Hopefully, I’ll blog a little more in the very near (and exciting) future. Hopefully, I haven’t completely lost you.

And hopefully, I can pull on my big girl panties and quit whining about fake problems. Fake. Ass. Problems.

Happy Friday and all that happy horse sh…
Much love, friends.
Mel

 

Missing: Motivation & Umph

I’m missing something that I just can’t put my finger on. It’s been a bit of an emotional week for me and I’m sure I’ll just have to chalk it all up to PMS (and a minor fall into the drama pit). I can feel myself being pulled back into bad habits – way too much tater tot casserole, sodas abound, snooze 30 minutes after I should be in the shower…

So I’m going to unplug… at least for a few days. This weekend, I want to figure a few things out:

1. What do I want to do with this blog;
2. How am I going to manage it;
3. Why can’t I stay on track with it all (including a weight loss competition that will net me 200+ fat ones???); and
4. How can I strike THAT balance (you know the one: life).

True to Friday form, here’s me at a glance in Week 7:

Thankfully, I didn’t gain any weight this week (surprising, really), and I even managed to lose an inch on my waist and hips – I guess those touch-your-toes are working.

I’m a little concerned about this lack of motivation because there’s a lot coming up. I mean, what if I start feeling this way 2 weeks into my first semester of school? I can’t just give up… I’m finding it hard to balance some personal expectations with perceived expectations. I think I might need a white board with “What Grizzly Bear Expects of Me”, “What I Expect of Me” and “What the World Expects of Me”. Except that last one, the only expectation listed would be “Who Cares”… that would be a motivational poster, eh?

Thank you to my faithful readers who have visited daily to see if I’m ranting or whining about something new today. You truly make me feel successful! Very soon, I’ll have something for you to sink your teeth into… once I upgrade this Lame Train ticket to an Awesome Aero package.

Cheers,
Mel